Affirmations I LOVE

Hello Everyone,

I wanted to share my FAVORITE affirmations that are on my Pinterest board.  I would read them often on my road to recovery after I was released from the inpatient hospital and still continue to read this affirmations today.  They have helped me then and still help me today and are good reminders because I sometimes get sucked back into negative thinking and body talk.  Enjoy and God Bless!!

~Angela

Body-Positive Mantras #healthy #confidence #bodyimageGive yourself some props! These (non-cheesy) quotes will help you start your day off right.

 

20 Body Image Quotes For Your Next Bad Day, Because Your Body Isn't The Problem

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words to live by                                                                                                                                                                                 More

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Packing it up

I have moved twice in my life, once to an apartment with little to nothing to move minus my clothing, and the move to our first home with a little more then clothing.  Nine years later we are moving for the third time and hopefully the last time to the family farm.  With this move we have way more items, stuff, some junk, and two children that have a TON of toys each.

Lets talk about packing with children, its sooo hard.  Every time I pack some of their stuff its like Christmas for them and they want to pull out all the toys that they haven’t played with for months but because its in a different place so its new again.  So, all that was packed became unpacked and all over the floor that was once cleaned but no longer.

Another stressful and hard part about this moving process is not being able to have all the foods in the home that I would normally have like frozen veggies, tons of fruits, and other healthy ingredients for delicious meals.  We’ve been trying to have easier meals on hand so we can pack up dishes and pots and pans.  A lot of the easier meals are the frozen family dinners in a bag or Mac & Cheese.  They are very good and good to have once in a while (in my eyes) but I know they are high in sodium and some of the ingredients aren’t the greatest.  I keep reminding myself that this is only temporarily and soon I will be able to cook our favorite healthy meals in our new home. I would take some pictures of the HUGE mess going on in the home or some food we have but I had packed my sweet camera.  The joys of moving and soon unpacking.  Thank goodness for Google Images.

Take Care and God Bless

~Angela

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Surprise, Surprise, Surprise!!

Here’s a little back story, before summer had started I had joined the Beach Body team and started my first program as a coach, 80 Day Obsession.  I LOVED IT!!! I completed 2.5 weeks of the program and was kicking some booty but almost towards week 3 I started to feel in the morning and would have to hit pause multiple times throughout the work out which wasn’t me and was hard for me to make myself take the break I needed so I wouldn’t vomit all over the floor.  I know icky!

Well when week 2 of feeling nausea hit I knew something wasn’t right and noticed I had missed my “time of the month” and millions of thoughts went through my head. “Ah shit did I lose to much weight and f***ed stuff up”,  I was told a week before I had lost too much weight so that’s why that thought came rumbling in.  Then the light bulb came on and I remembered we haven’t been preventing pregnancy.  I dug out a test that I purchased a month or two back when we decided to stop preventing, I was about to open it, but I stopped myself and chose to wait a few more days just in cause my “time of the month” would appear.  A few more days went by and I got the balls to finally take the test and I saw two beautiful blue lines, PREGNANT!  Excitement and joy ran through my veins and ran in by my hubs who was still sleeping and woke his ass up to share the news.  Needles to say he didn’t know what the hell was going on and then it sank in.

As the weeks went by and moving along in the pregnancy I became sooo sick and actually lost 15 pounds and had to make a trip in to the doctors office to get an iv put in and receive some fluids.  I tried some home remedies that the nurses gave me but nothing helped until I was finally put on some medication to stop the constant vomiting and nausea.  I finally started to feel like a myself again without having to take the meds around 14 weeks and life has been great.

I’m currently 18 weeks pregnant (5 months) and in two weeks we get to found out if baby is a boy or a girl.  I have been struggling with eating fruits and veggies which I normally love but my body or the baby just doesn’t want them.  I have to be in the mood for them but something my body or baby craves a lot is Doritos!  I love them and they have saved me many times in this pregnancy by making me feel better.

We are in the progress of selling our home and moving to the family farm house which is closer to most our family minus a few.  The selling of our home happened so fast its crazy, our home was on the market for one whole day and we had seven showings and 4 offers by the end of the day.  That was the longest day of my life and a pretty emotional day.  Oh and I am currently enrolled in a class that looks to be a wee bite challenging but it will be fun.

Take Care and God Bless

~Angela

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Favorite top 10 Movies

I’m the type of person who likes noise in the background when doing anything from cleaning to homework.  Noise in the background oddly keeps me focused on what I’m doing.  Is anyone else like this???  So growing up and even into my mid twenties I would play/watch movies from sun up tell sun down.  A lot of them where my favorite movies and some where movies I was watching for the first time.  I would even play my favorite movies to help me fall asleep.  Sense my husband switched to a different work shift and goes to bed before I do, I haven’t fallen asleep to my favorite movies in a long time.

Here we go, my top 10 favorite movies are…….

*First Blood

Image result for rambo first blood part 2

From Google Images

*First Blood; part two……ALL TIME FAVORITE

*First Blood; part 3

*Steel Magnolias

*Dirty Dancing

*You’ve Got Mail

*G.I Jane

*Justice League

*Batman; Dark Knight Raises

*Moana

Image result for Moana

From Google Images

Take Care and Gob Bless,

~Angela

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Snowstorm Weekend

Living in Wisconsin is always a fun time especially during Spring.  We went from having days in the upper 40’s to 50’s this week to being hit with a good old snow storm named Evelyn this weekend.  This started on Friday with rain and a thunderstorm which froze after the temps dropped and later Friday night turned into snow.  It snowed all day Saturday which meant a lot of family time and it was AWESOME.  We made art projects, watched movies, and ate pizza and chips.  We woke up this morning thinking maybe it stopped snowing but nope it was still snowing and is currently still snowing and blowing.  Its not suppose to stop tell Monday sometime.  The schools in Wisconsin have already cancelled for Monday which means no work for me tomorrow and some business and closed around the state too.

Having so much time at home has helped me think about my goals for 2018.  One of those goals is to truly love my body.  I want to stop looking at myself in the mirror with my swim suit on and pick apart my body.  Wishing my arms were more muscular, that the side of my legs had less fat, and so on.  I want to look at myself in the mirror and say, “dang this body looks awesome and is awesome”.  I know someday I will get to this point it will just take some time, some work, and I’m ready to do it.  I look forward to sharing my journey.

~God Bless,

Angela

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Living with ED

The road of recovery can be a bumpy one.  We may travel down a smooth road for a length of time but then out of know where we hit a big bump and the road becomes continuously bumpy.  Traveling down this bumpy road is when big emotions come up from the past or certain emotions that weren’t felt and dealt with.  Then we slowly start changing back to old habits of an Eating Disorder and we do not notices these changes for a little bit until a loved one points them out typically, which feels like a slap in the face and all knew questions come up in our minds.  Like “why haven’t I noticed this?  I never wanted this to happen again? and Why?”  I can answer a few of those questions.

The first question of “why haven’t you noticed” is the Eating Disorder didn’t want you to and he kept your mind busy and focusing on other things in life or the other stressors that perhaps sent you down the bumpy road.  That’s when ED shines he’s nasty head and inch by inch he takes over your mind; the way you think, the way you act, and how you’ve learned to love yourself.

The second question “I never wanted this to happen again”.  Nobody wants it to happen again but I believe when it does it helps us along our journey of recovery.  We see our therapists again and maybe the dietitian which are both good resources to have and use.

I have traveled down that bumpy road just 3 years ago.  I was a busy mamma, I had a two year old son, I had just finished college in one of the hardest programs, and was training for a half marathon.  On top of all of that I signed up to take my boards in August and had to start studying hard core because it coast about $600.00 and didn’t want to take it twice.  I became so involved with training for the half marathon and working that I didn’t notice the little changes at first like rearranging my schedule o make sure I could workout, being so tired, or not allowing myself to eat certain foods.

The light didn’t come on for me until my husband sent me a picture of me sleeping on the couch and I was skinny.  In my mind before that picture I wasn’t skinny and I had a mom body.  But when I saw that picture my first thought was “oh shit, I need help”.  I meet up my team of fabulous ladies, cut back at work, and focused on myself.  I worked through the new stressors and made a more realistic training plan for running.  I gained back more muscle and made sure I ate foods that I wanted when I wanted them.

By going down that bumpy path and dealing with the new stressors I was blessed with a second healthy son roughly 9 months later!

God Bless

~Angela

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2018

These last couple of months I have been feeling like I need share my story about my Eating Disorder and how life has been thus far.  When I started having these feelings I wasn’t sure how I wanted to go about sharing my story.  I had the idea of going to talk to Volleyball teams and other girl sport teams but then I thought “wow, that means you need confidence in talking in front of  crowds”.  Which isn’t my strongest skill currently so, I changed my mind for now.  I was chatting with Tim and he reminded me about my blog (this blog) and how I had enjoyed it so much in the past years.  Oh my goodness, I thought, how did I forgot about my blog especially since I have a Pinterest board labeled Blog and Body Image.

I would like to blame the fact of me forgetting about this blog on “mom brain”  seeing how I have a total of two children now.  Two very active and rambunctious boys that I wouldn’t change for the world.  But to but honest, it was life.  Life distracted me from something that I loved doing and found confidence in doing.  I know I have misspelled words from time to time but writing for fun and writing about something that means a lot to me gives confidence and I know I’m not going to be judged or graded.  I will try my best and keep the dictionary close by.  😉

On this blog I want to share my struggles and triumphs as a women dealing with an Eating Disorder, who is a mom of 2, working full time, working out, and seeking adventure.

I look forward to sharing so much more!  God bless!

~Angela

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